shitona stick
Nha Trang Review July-98
11/02/1999
Over to Doug and Ken for last week where we started Friday at NhaTrang for dinner: This cheap Vietnamese restaurant on Baxter, below Canal, in Chinatown looked a helluvalot like a cheap Chinese restaurant in Chinatown. Too bright, Holiday Inn conference Center furnishings, mirrored walls. Did I forget to mention it was too bright? Highlights: Everyone (but I) thought it was oh so funny when one of our eighteen-strong throng quipped that the "D" in front of every single menu item number was for Dog. However, I DID find our waiter, with his solicitous Vietnamese uncle routine, complete with the too-big facial expressions that reasonable adults don't use and that unreasonable adults only use with their newborn grandchildren("Delight!," "Surprise!") and accompanying sound effects for each dish to be a total fuckin' hoot.
Karla and Ken channel good food: Confronted a dauntingly long menu that we had NO intention of reading in full (though it was full of amusing malaprops), K&K (C&K?) zoned in on 3 or 4 (mostly fishy)selections, which were not only subsequently recommended by said waiter, but turned out to be rather swell overall. Among which was the delightful whole fried fish (Friday's was red snapper), which made us understand what the facial expressions were for. The other menu star was the chinese spinach. Tasty grilled pork chops added a meaty note. The egg rolls, spring rolls, and a noxious concoction of shrimp puree drizzled over, and encrusted upon, fresh-from-the-can (we saw them on the street) sugar cane stalks which some of us made the mistake of trying to eat (not on the street, on the table), were allstrictly Iowa-mall-food-court Chinese fare.
Not surprisingly, Ned liked, and ate, everything. "Fuckin'unbelievable! I can't believe you muthafuckas had food left at the other end of the table. Sheeit, I'll eat it." We ordered sparingly but still had plenty of (the not so good) food left and the whole feast (half of which was pretty fuckin good) was around $20 a head, including beers. Dominant strategy at Nha Trang: order variety, eat only what you like, & it's still cheap.
Where to next? A big issue given that we now have 18 in tow, and more(G$, etc.) descending upon us from uptown. We decide on a Chinese karaoke joint that a few of us had visited back in the day. But where the hell is it? As it turns out, 18 of us spill onto Baxter, stumble left and find that we're already there. WINNIE'S on Bayard in Chinatown is a seedy drinker karaoke bar.
After a few numbers by some of the presumably regular crowd, first on the mics wuz Ungie-Fresh (rockin an early hip hop version of Helen Reddy's"I Am Woman." Ung was feelin it, doin his best DJ RUN imitation. Fresh was up there too.) ....followed by Bon & Astrid (fresh from Montreal -- and back soon forr good thank gawd) with a sweet & smiley rendition of Madonna's "Material Girl." Who knew two girls could have so many teeth?
The rest is a jubilant blur after the all-girl gaggle of club kids inblack feather boas, big sunglasses, and sequined gowns showed up in full force (bachelorette party). Hours later the place was still packed and the singing become a group activity. And the regulars were still muttering "you've got to be kidding." We picked the right night to stumble into Winnie's.
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